suicide note to frantz fanon


saladin

& when i did become

this pale non-reflection

of myself

when did i slip into the

suit you brought with you

discarding myself to fit

inside not be left on the margin

bleeding and dying like the

naked savages you have

come to save me from

where did i go

while they were pouring the dom

was i trying on your face

sewing your shadow

over my naked blackness

embracing your sins

to fit in a saner reality

without the darkness

of me where am i did

i lose my mind in the pockets

of the tailor made jacket

2000 times the reason to show

up and help oppress those

not so well dressed in the

skins of their captures

kidnappers

thieves

rapist

murders

eating the weak dressing

the dead in dead end designer

dead in the mirror straight

jackets fashioned in

another paradigm

individually selected upgraded

self erasure limited stock

primed to self extinguish

can’t see myself

in the shadow of

you no more

no me

you win

you

you

you

my beloved

eat me

i am you

i am dead

i am nothing

you win

you

you

you

my darling

my ideal

my better

my savior

there is no me

you

you

you

I have been

removed

replaced

by your reflection

no me

no me

no me

frantz fanon

forgive me

About Ayodele Nzinga, MFA, PhD

I create; therefore I am.
This entry was posted in Black Arts, North American African Perspective, Performing Arts, Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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